Looking back over the years.
And the ups and downs of teaching and being a musician.
To say that 2023 was a challenge for everyone, would be a true understatement. Everything considered, I somehow have managed to just barely keep my head above water financially. When you are your own boss, the job itself is only part of the many things that have to be taken care of every day. I have been a guitar instructor (on and off) since 1996. It has always been a struggle to be a private in-home music teacher. Not because of the teaching part, but because of the nature of what I actually do. But, the story doesn’t begin there.
I started out working part time as a guitar teacher at the local music store. This decision was mostly done on a whim, and out of simple curiosity. I didn't know if I actually had it in me to teach others how to play the guitar. Other than showing a few of my friends and band mates how to play certain things on the guitar, I'd never taught formal lessons before. I didn't have any sort of degree from a college for to become a music teacher. The idea was for me to just show beginners what I knew, and hopefully, they would learn something. In all honesty, it was about a 50-60% success, at first. I soon realized that I had a lot to learn about teaching.
I also had a lot to learn about being my own boss. Every job I had ever worked in my life was simply a matter of showing up, punching the clock or signing in, and doing my job. I never had to deal with scheduling or finding work or making phone calls. This was all very new to me. I had to be on top of everything. Luckily, by the time I was doing all in-home lessons, I could do most of the organization on my computer.
Unfortunately, no matter how many things I got right, no matter how many lessons I learned about being a private instructor, there would always be the one dynamic that I had almost no control over…and that was the maintaining of a steady roster of students.
Not everyone who picks up a guitar is going to stick with it. I had to learn that no matter what I did to try to get some of my students to practice and put in the time, it would ultimately be their decision to quit. It was a difficult learning chapter for me to go through. I never thought that people would willingly want to give up playing a guitar. It took a long time for me to realize that not everyone is an instrumentalist. Not everyone has the passion to practice their guitar everyday, unconditionally. I remember feeling so guilty - like I was a bad teacher, like I wasn't doing my job properly. I then began to understand that mostly, it wasn't me. Life happens for people, and taking music lessons is usually seen as an expendable luxury - something they can try and quit if they lose interest or just want to give up. So, I stopped taking it personally.
Here's the thing.
I have worked hard for many years at many jobs. Most of those jobs, I worked long hours with satisfactory pay. Back then, life was affordable. If you had a full time job, you could probably do okay. Prior to going into teaching, I made good money at those jobs. I lived in nice apartments, had nice clothes, nice cars and motorcycles, money in my savings and food on my table. I never had to worry about paying bills on time or going without food. I did very well for many years. By the time I reached my thirties, I wanted something more. I was tired of working so hard and making someone else rich. I wanted something much more fulfilling in my life, something that would give me a genuine purpose. I wanted something that would make a difference in the world.
I have been an instrumentalist since the middle 1970's. The guitar and bass guitar are extensions of my soul. I am one of the lucky ones who found his talent and passion at an early age. I knew by high school that I wanted to be a musician. I didn't care about anything else. I played in dozens of bands over the years. I learned what it was like to be a part of a group, and how to work together to play and rehearse songs, and do them correctly and with passion.
Music has always been relatively easy for me. What better way to make a living? If only there were a way to make really good money, I would be set for life. Well, when you're an idealistic teenager, the only answer for me was to one day become a rock star. The very idea of traveling the world, playing on big stages to adoring fans and living the lifestyle of a famous musician, was all I wanted to do. In the early 1980's, my buddies and I would travel to Milwaukee or Madison to go see live rock bands. Back then, you could literally go anywhere in town and see a live show. This was how I learned - by observation and listening.
I wanted so badly to be one of those musicians - playing gigs all over town, partying with the band and the groupies, getting home at dawn, sleeping until the middle of the afternoon then doing it all over again the next night. I understood the hard work involved to get a band together and keep it together. I tried many times. Some of those bands did get out and play gigs. Some bands lasted only a few months, some lasted a few years. It was the most financially “unstable” thing I could have ever wanted to be a part of, but I didn't care. I wanted to be a musician.
Life happens.
Becoming an adult means taking on adult responsibilities. I had no choice but to conform to society and become a cog in the work-a-day machine. If I didn't work, I didn't make money and I couldn't live. I moved out of my parents house when I was 21-years-old. Doing this would require me to work a job that would pay me well. I got stuck at that job for nearly nine years. Instead of being out playing in bands with the guys, I was working six nights a week at a bakery. I got paid very well, but I had almost no social life whatsoever. Since I was working so many hours every week, I couldn't keep any sort of real band together. So, for most of the 1980's, I watched my dreams of rock stardom slowly disappear with my youth.
It would take me quitting that job in 1987 and moving to Florida, to give me that hope once again. I met local musicians, got into bands, played a few gigs - but nothing ever really came from any of it. Everyone had daytime jobs, families to raise and much higher priorities to think about - than being in a band. Life happens.
Then in 1994, I met my buddy and future band mate, Mike. He was the guitarist in a local band. I met him through our mutual friend, A.J., a fantastic bassist. A.J. and I worked together at Orlando International Airport in the early 1990's. I heard and saw Mike play a gig they were doing one night. I was completely blown away. I had never seen anyone play so fast and with such precision. That spark inside me was lit once again. I wanted to be a part of that band. I practiced all of their songs and learned them note for note. The passion I felt for wanting to be in a band with such incredible musicians, had never been so strong.
Mike and I became great friends. I eventually joined the band and played a few gigs. Again, life happens. Bands break up, change members and move on. Ultimately, Mike was the one who suggested I start teaching guitar lessons. He had the confidence in me. He knew that I could at least teach beginners. The rest is history.
Mike and I started another band in late 1999 with two other insane musicians. It was far and away the best band I had ever worked in. I was finally working with real pro musicians. There was nothing we couldn't play. We had no musical limits. It lasted for a few years, but once again - life happens. Our last gig as a band was in 2005. We've managed to stay in touch, but we've all changed and gone our separate ways.
I was never ready to give up the musician life dream. I just couldn't find it in me to grow up and work a mind-numbing, tediously-boring job. Some say that because of my "extreme stubborness", I have chosen to live the life of a pauper musician. I agree, wholeheartedly. The thing that most people who have daily jobs find difficult to comprehend, is why anyone would purposely choose to live like a poor person - but live free, rather than conform to slaving to the grind every waking minute of the day for the sake of the illusions of financially security. Most non-musicians have no idea the passion and commitment needed to be a creative soul, no matter what the art platform is. These are the same people who quit their guitar lessons. I feel badly for them for choosing to live a life without passion.
Being a musician is simply not for everyone. I am no longer driven by the need and the wanting of rock star wealth and financial stability. I learned long ago that this gift I possess inside me, comes with a greater responsibility. My purpose in life is to play my music and share my knowledge, so that it might make a real difference in the lives of others. My rewards are not about money. They are about my students learning how to play a song all the way through after months of practice and commitment. My rewards are when my students put bands together and play their own gigs. My rewards are when my students learn to teach others how to play the guitar. What better way to pass down knowledge than to see it being used in such positive ways?
My present students have stuck with me for a long time. They believe in themselves and they believe in their lessons with me. This belief is what keeps me going. It's what keeps me from living in the proverbial van down by the river. It's what allows me the freedom to express myself in these articles. I don't have it in me to work a job anymore. I'm not twenty-something. I'm not a kid. I've done my time. It's time for the younger generations to take over working jobs. Music is the air that I breath. Take it away and I will surely die.